WHAT I HATE ABOUT YOU!
by THESE VOICES WONT SHUT UP
Summary: Bella wrote letters to a bunch of people who she hates explaining why she hates them. She never wanted them to be sent, she was just venting. What happens when Edward accidentally sends them! Please I suck at summaries, but give it a try!
1. Victoria, I hate you

**SUMMARY: BELLA HAS WRITTEN A BUNCH OF LETTERS TO DIFFRENT PEOPLE, EXPLAINING HER HATE FOR THEM. WHAT HAPPENS WHEN EDWARD ACXEDENTLY SENDS THE LETTERS?!**

**DISCLAIMER:**

** ROSES ARE RED,**

**VIOLETS ARE VIOLET,**

**I DON'T OWN TWILIGHT,**

**AND I HAVE NO IDEA HOW TO FINISH THIS POEM**

**OTHER DISCLAIMER:**

**SPONGEBOB AND PATRICK AMAY BE STUPID**

**BUT THEY FOUND A WAY TO GET OUT OF ME OWNING THEM**

**HOW DID THEY OUTSMART ME?**

* * *

One day Bella asked Edward to take the mail to the mailbox. He found a pile of letters, in envelopes with addresses and stamps attached, next to the pile of bills that needs to be sent in. he thought nothing of it and brought them all to the mailbox without looking at who they were addressed to. he put the ten letters in the mail, along with the bills and went back inside to Bella.

**_Dear Victoria,_**

**_Die Victoria! Die. I hate you! Go to hell. Burn in the darkest pit of hell were no one can hear your pleading screams!!!! Pay for your many sins with blood and pain. You shall_**

**_ forever be given hell. You are nothing to the world but shit on its shoes, worthless and disgusting. Die Victoria die. When you burn I will dance on the ashes. You will get all you _**

**_disserve. Die! Die! Die! Die! Die! Die! Die! Die! Die! Burn! Burn! Burn! Burn in Hell! Your pathetic screams cannot be herd by anyone but the devil. And he will rip you limb from _**

**_limb. Scream until your throat is dry and no sound comes out. I will not drink your blood, no, do not fear that. But it will be used to bring you back. I will then beat you with the _**

**_blade of an ax, but not to death. I will then feed your arms and leg to a shark. Then I will cook your body, cut it up, and feed it to Aro for dinner. Finally I will hang your head, by _**

**_the ears, on the ceiling, for all to see. So go shoot yourself in the foot!! and then pull the bullet out and reload it into the gun. Next, shoot yourself in the face. Making sure the _**

**_bullet gets logged in your empty skull. And what's with your hair?! it looks like a blood stained birds nest. Ever heard of a brush?! You need one. I know you were having an _**

**_affair with Riley, while you were still with James!! Yes, i found the explicate note from him about how much 'fun' you had together!! Under your pillow? Seriously? worst place _**

**_to hide stuff! James wasn't killed by my Edward. James committed suicide to get away from your crap ugly face!! and Laurent asked the wolves to kill him to because your _**

**_bitchy requests *cough* commands *cough* were driving him insane. You drove a vampire insane!! Your are some crazy ass bitch!! Plus, your an idiot!! Patrick Star from _**

**_Spongebob is smarter than you. Read this note over and over until its stuck in your memory, and you relies what a piece of crap you are. Go suck your own balls, you firkin _**

**_bastered!! .._****_. Yeah, thats me flipin' you off-fa-fa!! Screw you!!_**

**_Love, Bella Cullen!!_**

Victoria finished reading the letter and yelled out in furry, "BBBBEEEELLLLAAAA CCCCUUUULLLLEEEENNNN!!!! YOUR DEAD!!!!" She than started to go through plans on how to kill Bella in the most painful way.

* * *

**(A/N HOPE YOU LIKED IT!! IF I GET THREE REVIEWS I WILL CONTINUE!! THE SOONER I GET REVIEWS, THE SOONER I'LL CONTINUE!! ANYONE YOU WANT ME TO WRITE A LETTER TO? ANY IMPROVEMENTS I COULD MAKE? I LOVE CONSTRUCTIVE CRITICISM!!)**


	2. Aro's gay!

**A/N THIS IS CHAP 2!! ENJOY!! P.S. EVERYONE IS STILL ALIVE, EXEPT FOR JAMES AND LAURENT!! THIS IS AFTER BREAKING DAWN!!**

**DISCLAIMER:**

**TWILIGHT IS NOT MINE... YET!!**

**IT ALL BELONGS TO STEPHINEY MEYER... FOR NOW**

**OTHER DISCLAIMER:**

**SHRIEK ISN'T MINE EITHER**

**I DON'T THINK I SPELLED IT RIGHT, BUT ITS THE BIG GREEN OGER THAT ALWAYS HAS THAT DONKEY FOLLOWING HIM!!**

* * *

Jane brought the mail in one saturday afternoon. Aro quickly looked over it. one letter caught his eye. he opened it up and read it...

* * *

**Dear Aro,**

**What the hell is your problem!? You son of a broccoli!! I am ranting because I hate your guts!!!! Why are you continuously trying to steal my Eddie-kins and Allie-poo from me and make them your minimum wage slaves!!? Give up!! They are under my super duper mind control power! Yeah, put that in your juice box and suck it!! And you are such a firkin Jack-o-lantern for having your minions coming to "clean up" right after we defeat the cockroach's army (the cockroach is Victoria)!! You are also ugly! And old! And stupid! And have milky eyes! And onionskin! You're a milky onion!! Gross!! You don't even have layers!! Shriek has layers! Why not you!! With those milky eyes, do cats try to like them? You probably eat the ones that do!! You ass! You eat kitties!! Your so lucky Edward isn't here to stop me from drinking whatever is in this bottle labeled whiskey!! Because if he was I would totally be bashing you with my advanced language!! I would use words such as 'you' and 'are' and 'a jerk'! This 'whiskey' stuff really brings out my anger and I'm venting at your idiocy and ickyness! And I can't stop listing the millions of things wrong with you!! Because there are so man things to list! So I'll make it easier for you and me!**

**Things wrong with Aro**

**1. Your gay**

**2. Your eyes are milky**

**3. Your old**

**4. You have no brain**

**5. Your gay**

**6. You don't know when to quit**

**7. You eat kitties**

**8. Your gay**

**9. You sit around all day**

**10. You are an onion**

**11. You have no life**

**12. Your gay**

**Ha!!!! So go shoot yourself in the foot you gay perverted faggot!!**

**Lots of Love,**

**Bella CULLEN!!**

* * *

A vein pulsed in his forehead as he read this!! he is not an onion!! he called Jane over. "Assemble an army!! We are going after Cullen."

* * *

**LOVED IT? HATE IT? ARE CRAVING PEPEROINY? TELL ME ANY PEOPLE YOU WANT A LETTER WRITTEN TO!! IF I GET FIVE REVIEWS I'LL UPDATE!! SO PLEASE REVIEW!! REVIEWERS GET COOKIES!! AND EDWARD CULLENS!!!!**


	3. Potato boy

Dear Mike,

OMFG!!!!!!!! Why are you, like, totally, stalking me?

I am even married and have a kid, and I still find your sent lingering around my cottage. What do you, like, watch Edward and me at night? * **Realization** * OME!! You do, don't you!!?? You sick perv!!

You are such a child!! With your _"baby"_ blue eyes, and blond hair, you even have baby fat on your face!! You're a baby!! OMG!!

***Another realization*** you aren't watching me!! Your watching Edward!!!!! AAAAHHHHH!!!! I knew you were gay!! Your like Aro the... ugh, guy that I... ugh, talked to... ugh, once. He's an onion!!!! But you're a potato!! Ahhh, potato boy is out to get us!!

I will do ninja moves on your non-existent balls!! Wwwaaaaaa-yyaaaaaaa!! That's my ninja sound!! I also can't believe you asked me out and when I said no, you went straight to Jessica. You rebound fast!! Well, potato boy, if you ever come on to my Eddie-weddie-poozie-kins, than I will rip off your hand and shove it up your ass.

So go shoot yourself in the foot!!

And well, yeah, I have no more to say, soooooooooo, I'm gonna end this letter now. Yeah.

No love,

Bella Cullen, er Swan, WHATEVER!

* * *

**i know its short but i had a brian fart. See, i eve spelt brain wrong. losts of my stories are on hold for now, but i had this written and wanted to get it posted. coolios, please review and give me ideas on other people i should do letters about! **


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